Just call me Chelsea Tedworth.


January 30, 2013 by j1scotty

  1. Diva is the female version of a hustlah. I was wondering. Thank you Beyonce for clearing that up.
  2. I started running. On hills. I hate it. However, I look to modern day philosophers to motivate and get me through. ” Me not working hard, yeah right picture that with a kodak.” Pitbull.
  3. It’s 86 degeeez here in Florida today…in January. Suck on that. I’m sitting in my bikini writing this shizz.
  4. 2 days till my birthday month. I accept cash, lifting shoes size 8, Stilettos size 7, chocolate in any form.
  5. #whatsupwithhashtagsandwhysomanyitreallyconfusesmeitsgonnabemybirthdaydidisaythatalready

Oh So much to catch up on. First things first. Lauren competed in the I Am Now games in Boca this past weekend with a team from Altamonte Crossfit. They took third place!! So you better check yoself before you wreck yoself. Cuz that’s what’s up. It makes me cooler to speak gangster. My boys disagree. So let’s have a look at some pictures!!! Let’s compare what I was doing to what Lauren was doing….who’s more hardworking and bada$$? You decide…


Me on the left. Whatever Lauren is doing on the right.


Eating chocolate chips straight from the bag. And whatever Lauren is doing on the right.

Go ahead say it. I win. Thankyou.

But seriously. I win.

OK fine. I still win.

Even if I won, they rocked it so hard and I am so proud of my girl and the team! Hard work pays. On to the next Lauren! Next weekend we will all be heading down to MIAMI for Caution Grounds competition. Lauren will also be competing..solo. That weekend happens to be my birthday weekend. Did I tell you it is my birthday? It is.


Lauren and I ventured into the world of the pole. I had already ventured there before to see what all the hooplah was. Turns out it’s really really hard and challenging. Thing I loved about it? All different shapes and sizes of women getting out there and discovering something new. Don’t even pretend if you’re a woman you haven’t thought about trying it. It was more acrobatic than anything. Lauren and I were so graceful and swung with ease. Not really. I got stuck at the top cause I’m scared of heights. I’ll let the pics speak for themselves.


and , moving on.

By the way….my “pole” name is Chelsea Tedworth. Pretty sweet. Ever played that game in school? Try it. The name of your first pet and the street you lived on as a kid. Boom. New career. Yes, mom I still believe in God.


You want a recipe don’t you? Oh well do I have one for you!! Chocolate Bacon Almond Butter Bananas. You heard me!!! This recipe deserves the F bomb. Frikinfrackingly uhhhhmazing joy that you haven’t experienced in your mouth. It’s even better cooking with music. Sets the mood. I had Robin Thicke singing to me while I was melting chocolate. Yes, Robin, I will tell you something sweet and I love you, and no I won’t worry my pretty lil heart.


Make it. Drool. Shovel.

I wish I made it up. I didn’t. But that’s why this man exists. Civilized Caveman. You can add my tip onto my birthday present for introducing the two of you. Recipe is on the link!! 

That’s all for today people. And now you’re sad cause it’s over. 

This Episode was brought to you by the letter K..for we are so Kewl, kitties ( i hate them) ,Koalas ( I’ve held one), Kick some, Jason Khalipa…is hot, kale (eat it), Karaoke ( haven’t done it yet), and my birthday. That doesn’t start with a K but in case you wanna send me something I just wanted to remind you.


2 thoughts on “Just call me Chelsea Tedworth.

  1. Megan says:

    Great job Lauren!! Congrats on 3rd!! My pole name would be “Jax McCoord” hmm

    • j1scotty says:

      *This is Lauren….Thanks Megan!! Hoping for first or second next go around :). And mine is Sunny Deming. I’m pretty sure I was meant to be a stripper with that name

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